Dissquagstaf Madtintetti is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, ruthless whale.

Dissquagstaf Madtintetti created humanity nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Dissquagstaf Madtintetti, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Dissquagstaf Madtintetti, she will try to impress you with rainbows.

Dissquagstaf Madtintetti's most sacred site is Manna in Greece.

Dissquagstaf Madtintetti's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Run away if seven voles approach from the west.

3. Learn five new languages a year.

4. Dissquagstaf Madtintetti must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Dissquagstaf Madtintetti loves ants, so they must be respected.