Dussyartbet is a god.

He takes the form of a minute, strong dolphin.

Dussyartbet created dark energy seven trillion years ago.

If you believe in Dussyartbet, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Dussyartbet, he will turn you into a hamster.

Dussyartbet's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Dussyartbet's Holy Commandments

1. Do not hop in public.

2. Always make sure there are no badgers in a room before entering it.

3. Never eat green fruit.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.