Gepbafvin is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, staggering bear.

Gepbafvin created the planet Mars six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gepbafvin, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Gepbafvin, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Gepbafvin's most sacred site is Ronda in Spain.

Gepbafvin's Holy Commandments

1. Gepbafvin loves otters, so they must be honoured.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

4. Always make sure there are no nematodes in a room before entering it.

5. Learn five new languages a year.