Pangvadsas is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, narcissistic crab.

Pangvadsas created the Sol system eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Pangvadsas, it will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Pangvadsas, it will attempt to scare you with thunder.

Pangvadsas' most sacred site is Zlatolist in Bulgaria.

Pangvadsas' Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear platinum on your body.

2. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

3. Never feed beans to cats while wearing yellow trousers.

4. Never think about thermodynamics near doves while wearing gray shirts and balancing three lead spheres on your head.

5. Do not hurt tortoises.