Sugfaggofnurguphanbarnvig is a god.

He takes the form of a small, strong chinchilla.

Sugfaggofnurguphanbarnvig created viruses five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Sugfaggofnurguphanbarnvig, he will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Sugfaggofnurguphanbarnvig, he will attempt to scare you with hail.

Sugfaggofnurguphanbarnvig's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Sugfaggofnurguphanbarnvig's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat green fruit.

2. Feed all hungry grasshopers.

3. Always help sick sheep.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics near manatees while wearing white shoes.

5. Do not drink water in fawn rooms.