Xinwatkem is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, overgenerous guinea pig.

Xinwatkem created silver three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xinwatkem, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Xinwatkem, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Xinwatkem's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Xinwatkem's Holy Commandments

1. Never look in ponds.

2. Never go into mauve rooms.

3. Do not dye your hair violet.

4. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

5. You must love Xinwatkem.