Gabhomfungid is a god.

He takes the form of a six thousand metre long, tiresome jaguar.

Gabhomfungid created the Small Magellanic Cloud eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gabhomfungid, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Gabhomfungid, he will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Gabhomfungid's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Gabhomfungid's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant mauve sculpture of Gabhomfungid in the centre of the settlement.

2. Do not stand on grass.

3. Never jump near swans.

4. Tortoises are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Always look after injured porpoises.