Jopfadlog is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, boastful lobster.

Jopfadlog created the Small Magellanic Cloud five billion years ago.

If you believe in Jopfadlog, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Jopfadlog, she will name a particularly small and pointless asteroid after you.

Jopfadlog's most sacred site is Amrit in Egypt.

Jopfadlog's Holy Commandments

1. Never feed lots of corn to ants while wearing turquoise corsets.

2. Never think about the inheritance of acquired characteristics.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Never talk about galaxies.

5. Never sing in the presence of badgers.