Pon is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, slow gorilla.

Pon created Europe two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pon, he will give you a massive pile of rare-earth elements.

If you do not believe in Pon, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Pon's most sacred site is Rautio in Finland.

Pon's Holy Commandments

1. Always help ducks.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Do not trade with those who eat apples.

4. Do not hurt birds.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.