Zakbidbug is a god.

He takes the form of a plump, unthinking crane.

Zakbidbug created the planet Earth four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Zakbidbug, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Zakbidbug, he will destroy your favourite star.

Zakbidbug's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Zakbidbug's Holy Commandments

1. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never talk about shrews.

4. Run away if five nematodes approach from the north.

5. Permit no heathen within the settlement walls.