Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, charitable bat.

Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag created a Higgs boson seven million years ago.

If you believe in Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag, it will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag, it will destroy your favourite solar system.

Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag's most sacred site is Farnetta in Italy.

Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag's Holy Commandments

1. Run away if six rats approach from the south.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Never think about ribonucleic acid.

4. Worship no other gods but Barnqueegsigkonvadgilzag.

5. Never leap in holy places.