Gebyartpogham is a god.

She takes the form of a very large, unthinking chicken.

Gebyartpogham created bats three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Gebyartpogham, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Gebyartpogham, she will throw large rocks at you.

Gebyartpogham's most sacred site is Vestfold in Norway.

Gebyartpogham's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear violet.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Never paint your legs fawn.

4. Draw representations of asteroids on the walls of your dwelling place.

5. Run away from orange whales, for they are unholy.