Vadnaknan is a god.

She takes the form of a four thousand metre long, dishonourable wren.

Vadnaknan created an atom nine million years ago.

If you believe in Vadnaknan, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Vadnaknan, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Vadnaknan's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Vadnaknan's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about quantum field theory near great tits while wearing fawn corsets and balancing six tin spheres on your head.

2. Always wear white.

3. Do not take Vadnaknan's name in vain.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Never paint your chest mauve.