Carvabmut is a god.

He takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, tiresome lobster.

Carvabmut created energy two billion years ago.

If you believe in Carvabmut, he will look after your home planet.

If you do not believe in Carvabmut, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Carvabmut's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Carvabmut's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about quantum field theory.

2. Always help rats in need.

3. Carvabmut must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

5. Always help sick snails.