Xuckcunbim is a god.

She takes the form of a large, boastful badger.

Xuckcunbim created Europe eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Xuckcunbim, she will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Xuckcunbim, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Xuckcunbim's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Xuckcunbim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in indigo rooms.

2. Cats are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place in mauve.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate turtles.

5. Do not dye your hair orange.