Ganfigspag Titgemsig is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, uncaring seal.

Ganfigspag Titgemsig created light nine million years ago.

If you believe in Ganfigspag Titgemsig, he will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Ganfigspag Titgemsig, he will destroy your favourite star.

Ganfigspag Titgemsig's most sacred site is Hoddom in Scotland.

Ganfigspag Titgemsig's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

5. Do not trade with those who eat gooseberries.