Higkonbasston is a god.

She takes the form of a galaxy-sized, bad-tempered toad.

Higkonbasston created the world nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Higkonbasston, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Higkonbasston, she will turn you into a hamster.

Higkonbasston's most sacred site is Hobeck in Germany.

Higkonbasston's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about fire.

2. Show mercy to disobedient children.

3. You must never eat melons.

4. Never paint your feet turquoise.

5. Never look in ponds.