Tonranpog Honhivabflansab is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, pitiless slug.

Tonranpog Honhivabflansab created matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Tonranpog Honhivabflansab, it will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Tonranpog Honhivabflansab, it will not care.

Tonranpog Honhivabflansab's most sacred site is Embalam in India.

Tonranpog Honhivabflansab's Holy Commandments

1. Always make sure there are no great tits in a building before entering it.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Tonranpog Honhivabflansab loves mice, so they must be honoured.

4. Never paint your head black.

5. Erect a giant aluminium sculpture of Tonranpog Honhivabflansab in the centre of the settlement.