Zimdumquatgudjam is a god.

It takes the form of a microscopic, almighty crane.

Zimdumquatgudjam created the Sun seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Zimdumquatgudjam, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Zimdumquatgudjam, it will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Zimdumquatgudjam's most sacred site is Karikalampakkam in India.

Zimdumquatgudjam's Holy Commandments

1. Learn three new languages a year.

2. Always wear pink.

3. Pray towards the north.

4. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

5. Zimdumquatgudjam loves dogs, so they must be respected.