Stragwodcim is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, charitable yak.

Stragwodcim created a down quark five billion years ago.

If you believe in Stragwodcim, she will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Stragwodcim, she will send you a sign.

Stragwodcim's most sacred site is Brechfa in Wales.

Stragwodcim's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in violet rooms.

2. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Stragwodcim.

3. Never hurt capybaras.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Never mention snails.