Hastargdub is a god.

He takes the form of a slim, cheerful turtle.

Hastargdub created light four billion years ago.

If you believe in Hastargdub, he will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hastargdub, he will try to impress you with trees.

Hastargdub's most sacred site is Gorbio in France.

Hastargdub's Holy Commandments

1. Your children must be taught to worship Hastargdub.

2. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

3. Never eat melons.

4. Do not chop down trees.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of copper.