Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, calm toad.

Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam created a photon nine thousand years ago.

If you believe in Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam, it will send five hundred and sixty eight geese to peck you to death.

Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam's most sacred site is Villaseta in Italy.

Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Dunmipnarsiscimwotnurtlam.

2. Do not trade with those who eat carrots.

3. Never look in ponds.

4. Do not shave your hands.

5. Hide from magenta eagles for they are unholy.