Loparmzenlidgencit is a god.

It takes the form of a two thousand metre long, intelligent crab.

Loparmzenlidgencit created Mount Everest three billion years ago.

If you believe in Loparmzenlidgencit, it will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Loparmzenlidgencit, it will come to you in dreams.

Loparmzenlidgencit's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Loparmzenlidgencit's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about ultrasonics near snakes while wearing gray shirts and balancing six lead spheres on your chest.

2. Never paint your head violet.

3. Do not wear silver on your body.

4. Do not dye your hair white.

5. Never eat lentils.