Fomcenved is a god.

She takes the form of a blubbery, omnipotent centaur.

Fomcenved created a photon eight million years ago.

If you believe in Fomcenved, she will smite all your enemies.

If you do not believe in Fomcenved, she will be very sad.

Fomcenved's most sacred site is Daren in Wales.

Fomcenved's Holy Commandments

1. Never talk about electromagnetism near doves while wearing green corsets.

2. Do not kill tortoises.

3. Feed all hungry foxes.

4. Erect a giant magenta sculpture of Fomcenved in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never write about moons.