Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow is a god.

It takes the form of a large, caring toad.

Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow created matter seven billion years ago.

If you believe in Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow, it will jump up and down on your head.

Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow's most sacred site is Inshas in Egypt.

Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow's Holy Commandments

1. Never think ill of sick seals.

2. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

3. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Ripvinbig Fagwikfat Nibfagrow on top of all buildings.

4. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

5. Always help foxes.