Fundimpag is a god.

It takes the form of a planet-sized, emotional human.

Fundimpag created a strange quark nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Fundimpag, it will celebrate by creating some universes.

If you do not believe in Fundimpag, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Fundimpag's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Fundimpag's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about bacteria.

2. Never pour water over plants.

3. Never look at black holes.

4. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

5. Draw representations of dwarf planets on the walls of your dwelling place.