Benrutpop is a god.

He takes the form of a slender, annoying tapir.

Benrutpop created the cosmos four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Benrutpop, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Benrutpop, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Benrutpop's most sacred site is Grimme in Germany.

Benrutpop's Holy Commandments

1. Potatoes are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Never think about chlorophyll.

3. Do not shave your back.

4. Never talk about fire.

5. Hide from brown tapirs for they are unholy.