Buthamvid is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, narcissistic faun.

Buthamvid created vertebrates seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Buthamvid, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Buthamvid, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Buthamvid's most sacred site is Shengyou in China.

Buthamvid's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at stars.

2. Do not wear titanium on your body.

3. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

4. Do not speak about peas.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.