Siscenhot Rulgofrak Larpfomkon is a god.

It takes the form of a three hundred metre long, proud tapir.

Siscenhot Rulgofrak Larpfomkon created Africa eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Siscenhot Rulgofrak Larpfomkon, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Siscenhot Rulgofrak Larpfomkon, it will cry a lot.

Siscenhot Rulgofrak Larpfomkon's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Siscenhot Rulgofrak Larpfomkon's Holy Commandments

1. Retreat if eight eagles approach from the south.

2. Never think about chromosomes.

3. Never write about asteroids.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.