Hitfumkap is a god.

She takes the form of an one thousand metre long, flying crocodile.

Hitfumkap created parasitic wasps eight million years ago.

If you believe in Hitfumkap, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Hitfumkap, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Hitfumkap's most sacred site is Auvillar in France.

Hitfumkap's Holy Commandments

1. Never mention seals.

2. Do not make images of living things.

3. Never think about dark matter near frogs while wearing orange skirts and balancing four gold spheres on your feet.

4. Do not covet oxen.

5. Always help eagles in need.