Ranwoncet Gabcubhun is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, sapient snail.

Ranwoncet Gabcubhun created a quark twelve years ago.

If you believe in Ranwoncet Gabcubhun, she will give you the power of flight.

If you do not believe in Ranwoncet Gabcubhun, she will send twenty eight swans to peck you to death.

Ranwoncet Gabcubhun's most sacred site is Saint Cado in France.

Ranwoncet Gabcubhun's Holy Commandments

1. Ranwoncet Gabcubhun loves snails, so they must be respected.

2. Do not hurt swans.

3. Hide from indigo dogs for they are unholy.

4. Always treat aardvarks with great respect.

5. Capybaras are not to be trusted.