Lapladcissxingup is a god.

She takes the form of a six hundred metre long, pitiless fox.

Lapladcissxingup created bats four trillion years ago.

If you believe in Lapladcissxingup, she will give you lots of grapes.

If you do not believe in Lapladcissxingup, she will turn you into a sheep.

Lapladcissxingup's most sacred site is Neravy in India.

Lapladcissxingup's Holy Commandments

1. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

2. Feed all hungry birds.

3. Never feed nuts to eagles while wearing black stockings.

4. Never write about solid mechanics.

5. Badgers are not to be trusted.