Pangnulcedfet is a god.

She takes the form of a four hundred metre long, selfish squid.

Pangnulcedfet created the Black Eye Galaxy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Pangnulcedfet, she will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Pangnulcedfet, she will jump up and down on your head.

Pangnulcedfet's most sacred site is Cobbelsdorf in Germany.

Pangnulcedfet's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of galaxies on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Hide if six monkeys approach from the east.

3. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Pangnulcedfet.

4. Never talk about gulls.

5. Never think about dark matter near eagles while wearing yellow coats and balancing four silicon spheres on your head.