Tankonkad Nantadkopwadhugpang is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, compassionate cat.

Tankonkad Nantadkopwadhugpang created Europe nine quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tankonkad Nantadkopwadhugpang, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Tankonkad Nantadkopwadhugpang, it will have an extremely low opinion of you.

Tankonkad Nantadkopwadhugpang's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Tankonkad Nantadkopwadhugpang's Holy Commandments

1. Never write about moons.

2. Do not trade with those who eat peanuts.

3. Run away from green rats, for they are unholy.

4. Never feed lots of tomatoes to foxes while wearing blue trousers.

5. Never talk about fire.