Labbogfoss is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, fast gnu.

Labbogfoss created vertebrates five trillion years ago.

If you believe in Labbogfoss, it will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Labbogfoss, it will turn you into a snail.

Labbogfoss' most sacred site is Didy in Madagascar.

Labbogfoss' Holy Commandments

1. Always treat seals with great respect.

2. Never skip near gulls.

3. Never talk about quantum mechanics near turtles while wearing red shorts and balancing four zinc spheres on your face.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Always help sick dolphins.