Tapfondum is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, conceited crane.

Tapfondum created everything that exists six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Tapfondum, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Tapfondum, he will send you a sign.

Tapfondum's most sacred site is Miiluranta in Finland.

Tapfondum's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about comets.

2. Do not dye your hair mauve.

3. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

4. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Tapfondum in the centre of the settlement.

5. Never talk about capybaras.