Sitwikban is a god.

He takes the form of a six hundred metre long, confident yak.

Sitwikban created the planet Jupiter eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sitwikban, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Sitwikban, he will destroy your home planet.

Sitwikban's most sacred site is Olmarch in Wales.

Sitwikban's Holy Commandments

1. Paint representations of comets on the walls of your dwelling place.

2. Always help dolphins.

3. Do not drink from vessels made of base metals.

4. Look mercifully on unfortunate sharks.

5. Do not shave your head.