Nilnilbim is a god.

He takes the form of a nine hundred metre long, merciless hare.

Nilnilbim created the world nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Nilnilbim, he will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nilnilbim, he will make you grow a tail.

Nilnilbim's most sacred site is Meidrim in Wales.

Nilnilbim's Holy Commandments

1. Worship no other gods but Nilnilbim.

2. Manatees are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Erect a giant turquoise sculpture of Nilnilbim in the centre of the settlement.

4. Always make sure there are no grasshopers in a building before entering it.

5. Your children must be taught to worship Nilnilbim.