Cedtettinakvontomdim is a god.

She takes the form of an exceedingly large, fussy chicken.

Cedtettinakvontomdim created oxygen four years ago.

If you believe in Cedtettinakvontomdim, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Cedtettinakvontomdim, she will turn you into a blue tit.

Cedtettinakvontomdim's most sacred site is Cobbel in Germany.

Cedtettinakvontomdim's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at black holes.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Never think about thermodynamics.

4. Feed all hungry sharks.

5. Always look both ways before crossing roads.