Flapyogbiss is a god.

He takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, ruthless tapir.

Flapyogbiss created a Higgs boson two million years ago.

If you believe in Flapyogbiss, he will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Flapyogbiss, he will turn you into a worm.

Flapyogbiss' most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Flapyogbiss' Holy Commandments

1. Never feed oranges to snakes while wearing orange shorts.

2. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.

3. Feed all hungry squirrels.

4. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

5. You must love Flapyogbiss.