Timmapzagtiflargfut is a god.

It takes the form of a minute, selfish elephant.

Timmapzagtiflargfut created parasitic wasps two years ago.

If you believe in Timmapzagtiflargfut, it will be shocked.

If you do not believe in Timmapzagtiflargfut, it will boil you in a big pot.

Timmapzagtiflargfut's most sacred site is Iskmo in Finland.

Timmapzagtiflargfut's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat figs.

2. Look mercifully on unfortunate mice.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Timmapzagtiflargfut.

4. Never look at asteroids.

5. Never pour water over plants.