Targstafflab is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, irritating otter.

Targstafflab created the Sun five thousand years ago.

If you believe in Targstafflab, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Targstafflab, she will turn you into a sparrow.

Targstafflab's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Targstafflab's Holy Commandments

1. Never laugh near whales.

2. Never play with disobedient children.

3. Do not stand on grass.

4. Never paint your head gray.

5. Never talk about quantum field theory near turtles while wearing blue stockings and balancing five gold spheres on your legs.