Govzagman is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, humane wombat.

Govzagman created a Higgs boson six million years ago.

If you believe in Govzagman, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Govzagman, she will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Govzagman's most sacred site is Dimson in England.

Govzagman's Holy Commandments

1. Always wear orange.

2. Never mention geese.

3. Do not listen to heathen tongues.

4. Always make a point of helping unfortunate voles.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.