Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart is a god.

He takes the form of an enormous, thoughtless hyena.

Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart created gold seven million years ago.

If you believe in Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart, he will be happy.

If you do not believe in Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart, he will turn you into a slug.

Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart's most sacred site is Mmankgodi in Botswana.

Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart's Holy Commandments

1. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart.

2. Do not listen to music.

3. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

4. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Fudgebmoncitlimfarnquart on top of all buildings.

5. Always wear black.