Geptailbongedwot is a god.

She takes the form of a planet-sized, tiresome goat.

Geptailbongedwot created dark matter nine million years ago.

If you believe in Geptailbongedwot, she will be surprised.

If you do not believe in Geptailbongedwot, she will destroy your favourite solar system.

Geptailbongedwot's most sacred site is Manakuppam in India.

Geptailbongedwot's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into pink rooms.

2. Never talk about shrews.

3. Do not listen to music.

4. Do not drink from vessels made of gold.

5. Always help eagles in need.