Ranquill is a god.

He takes the form of a seven thousand metre long, fast manatee.

Ranquill created bats four million years ago.

If you believe in Ranquill, he will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Ranquill, he will destroy your favourite star.

Ranquill's most sacred site is Manja in Madagascar.

Ranquill's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three ants approach from the south.

2. Never hurt aardvarks.

3. You must never eat parsnips.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.