Fobsabfar is a god.

It takes the form of an exceedingly large, selfish walrus.

Fobsabfar created dark matter four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Fobsabfar, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Fobsabfar, it will attempt to scare you with earthquakes.

Fobsabfar's most sacred site is Fangchuan in China.

Fobsabfar's Holy Commandments

1. Never go into white rooms.

2. Never talk about fluid mechanics.

3. Never think about the strong nuclear force near swans while wearing gray corsets and balancing nine iron spheres on your face.

4. Never look in ponds.

5. Erect a large silver sculpture of Fobsabfar on top of all buildings.
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