Hadcedsaf is a god.

She takes the form of a fat, capable fairy.

Hadcedsaf created viruses four billion years ago.

If you believe in Hadcedsaf, she will look on you favourably.

If you do not believe in Hadcedsaf, she will send you a sign.

Hadcedsaf's most sacred site is Polagam in India.

Hadcedsaf's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Learn four new languages a year.

3. Do not kill gulls.

4. Erect a giant brown sculpture of Hadcedsaf in the centre of the settlement.

5. Look mercifully on unfortunate nematodes.