Dotfodkab is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, loving human.

Dotfodkab created a quark two years ago.

If you believe in Dotfodkab, she will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Dotfodkab, she will torture you forever.

Dotfodkab's most sacred site is Dingcun in China.

Dotfodkab's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Never eat bark.

3. Fast once a month.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Dotfodkab.

5. Erect eight copper sculptures of Dotfodkab on top of important buildings.