Motyikxen is a god.

She takes the form of a five hundred metre long, amazing ant.

Motyikxen created tapeworms nine million years ago.

If you believe in Motyikxen, she will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Motyikxen, she will send three marmosets to sort you out.

Motyikxen's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Motyikxen's Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Do not wear red clothing.

3. Do not eat onions.

4. Never write about the strong nuclear force.

5. Run away if five seals approach from the east.